turning 30 — summing up the last decade

views, as usual, are mine and may bear no resemblance to every 30 year old. i’ve had my share of ups and learnings, and thought this would be a good blog to go back to in another 10 years.

if you asked me ten years ago, i don’t think i could have predicted that this is how my life would end up as i enter the decade of my 30s, but i live in a house by myself, am running my own company (living the dream on days i’m not sharing otp’s), have a solid support system in my family and close friends — so who’s complaining :)

it’s tough to pinpoint which moments or days shaped who i am today. the learning was probably in every conversation, decision, success, and failure — professional and personal — that i experienced in my 20s, which slowly made me the person i have become over the last 10 years. in no particular order, here are some of my bigger realisations:

1. there’s nothing called a ‘perfect job’: it’s always what you make of it. raise that hand, go the extra mile, put in your goddamn best. to win, you have always have to swim upstream early on — and that requires hard work and long hours 🙋‍♀️
   ps. i also think there is no such thing as work-life balance. everything worth fighting for will rebalance your life. important to understand the difference, and don’t @ me.
2. know your core values and your biggest moat: and stay true to them. i realized my two major core values are honesty and fearlessness, and i would never put myself in a situation where either need to be compromised. similar thoughts on finding your moat - what sets you apart from the others? keep at it, build your circle of competence. for me i think it’s speed of execution. i’d read this earlier this year and it stuck — speed of execution is the moat inside which live all other moats. speed is your best strategy. speed is your strongest weapon. speed has THE highest correlation to mammoth outcomes. those who conflate speed w/ ‘thoughtlessness’ haven’t seen world class execution @ speed.
3. the 10/10/10 rule: overthinking/ emotional responses are the root cause of most problems. i’ve had my share of these. if you find yourself in this situation too, just ask yourself - how will i feel about it 10 minutes from now? how about 10 months from now? how about 10 years from now? if it’s not going to matter in 10 years, don’t waste more than 10 mins on it. always learn to depersonalise situations. and people.
4. growth takes a much longer time coming than you think, and then it happens much faster than you ever would have thought. growth happens gradually, then suddenly. when you realize this, you start to do things differently. same for change 📈
5. compounding is the 8th wonder of the world: beyond $$, this is also true for hard work, relationships++ she who understands it, earns it.
6. you gotta blow your own trumpet, baby: literally no one else will. you can’t be what you can’t see, so go put yourself out there.
7. checklists ftw. no questions or explanations needed 📝 #iykyk
8. friendships change: life happens. over the last five years i’ve figured which ones are really important to me and focus on those relationships. it means giving it time, it means them understanding when you can’t — find your cheerleaders, and cheerlead/ show up for them too.
9. our parents are getting old: bummer, right? but they are. don’t ignore that call, make that extra one, see them as often as you can. i’m still trying to work on this.
10. passion does not pay bills: “follow your dreams, do what you love, quit your job” — don’t. be smart about these decisions. your passion does not always have to be your career, it has to make financial sense. do it when you’re ready, and if you’re willing to give it the time. 🌱
11. make time to do nothing: time spent doing nothing is underrated. all these years, i thought downtime means zoning out and staring at the tv and forgetting about work. but actually, true downtime means no goal and no focused attention. watching a show on ott isn’t downtime because it requires your attention. same for when you run or go to the gym, you’re working towards a goal — and concentrating on what you’re doing. the only actual downtime we have is in the shower. sure enough, the shower has always been my best time for ideas 💡
12. pick your battles: always fight the good fight, but also know when not to. sleeping over it (last two years) has been a winner for me. i often wake up with better judgement. well, on most days.
13. play the long game: always say no to mediocre. true for love, life, work++
14. in your hardest times you learn your biggest lessons: understand it more now than i would have 5 years ago. keep at it!
15. give a fuck: i see a lot of people who go the ‘don’t give a fuck’ route. truth is, i don’t understand it. life is an inspired person’s game. having something to give a damn about is a reason to get out of bed in the morning. so you do you, but more importantly:

don’t forget to enjoy the ride!